Earlier in this semester I attended the first funeral of my adult life. Mr. Conley was a member at the golf course I work at in Bonita Springs, and was one of the first members to introduce himself to me and welcome me to the club. In my 4 years of knowing the man we all called Iron Mike, he was an incredible person who always had a smile on his face and a joke flying out of his mouth. A little less than a year before his death he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, a diagnosis that he kept quiet for as long as he possibly could. Although he was facing a terminal illness, his positive spirit remained and that was the most talked about attribute at his service.
The funeral service was really the first time I've been exposed to death in my adult life and now that we're a ways into this course I've taken some time to step back and reflect on my experience that day. This course has allowed me to realize that although I had viewed his death as a tragic event, his end of life experience, as described by his family members, was everything he could have asked for. He was surrounded by his family and close friends and was at peace.
RIP Iron Mike Conley.
I recently had someone close to my family pass away from pancreatic cancer, too. I had become very close to my boyfriend's Grandma Grace and when I heard she was diagnosed with cancer, my heart broke for her and my boyfriend's family.
ReplyDeleteEven when she was in pain, she kept her spirits high and almost always had a smile on her face. Whenever anyone was around her she knew how to bring a smile to their face as well.
When she passed away a few months ago she did so in a way we believe she would have wanted. She was home from the hospital with her whole family by her side. Early one morning while lying next to her daughter she took her last breath, and peacefully fell into a never ending sleep.
I was not able to attend her funeral, but I know over 1,000 people visited her on the day of her wake to pay their respects. She touched so many lives and I am so grateful that I had the opportunity to meet such an amazing woman.
My grandfather passed away this July, and it was also my first real experience with death since I was a young teenager. I helped out with his care as much as I could during his year and a half of battling cancer, but somehow it wasn't until I witnessed his last few days, and his funeral, that I realized just how much his life had meant to so many people. He died at peace, and in retrospect, I don't think anyone in my family could have asked for anything better.
ReplyDeleteI remember my first funeral experience as well. I was incredibly young -- I must have been around eight years old. The funeral was for one of my mom's coworkers' kid that had died. The boy was about 4 years old and was playing in the backyard when he latched onto a wall and the concrete seemed to collapse onto him.
ReplyDeleteI met the boy at a Christmas party in Miami, where all the parents' kids would play together and get to know each other while the adults would dance and talk. The accident happened about a week after this party, and I remember overhearing my mother saying she wasn't going to bring the kids because she didn't want us around that kind of environment.
For some reason, I felt the need I had to go, and I convinced my mother to go and I attended my first funeral. It was a sad moment feeling everyone else's grief as a child. Nevertheless, I understood their pain.
When I was in middle school I had my first experience with someone close to me dying. Ironically my first dog Clyde died of Pancreatic cancer. Research says Pancreatic cancer is extremely rare for animals, especially dogs. It is very heartbreaking to watch anyone battle cancer. Although I did not know how serious the cancer was at the time, I remember Clyde being so strong and happy too. In fact, you’d never know he was sick. How amazing that your boyfriend’s grandma could be surrounded by her family during her passing. Clyde died in my father’s arms and I know he left peacefully as well.
ReplyDeleteMy first funeral was probably a good buffer for me. I am a very emotional person, especially when it comes to my family members and close friends, so luckily my first funeral was no one that I knew personally. My boyfriend had grown up next door to a very elderly woman, and his family adopted her as one of their own. A few years ago she died at the aged of 96. It had been a long time coming so the family was prepared, but he wanted me to attend the funeral with him. I wasn't sure how I would react, but it was a very small peaceful service. There weren't any histarically crying guests and there was only two person who spoke. It was a very calming ceremony, and it eased my mind to what a funeral was like. I feel that after that experience, and this class, that I am prepared (at least to a certain extent) for any deaths that will occur.
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